The OBOccasionals Tour to Ansião
There comes a time on tour when you find yourself drinking gin and tonics and discussing preferred stock with a team-mate who is dressed in a full-length fox outfit. Nearby, another teammate, wearing butterfly wings, is attempting to replicate the Duelling Banjos scene from Deliverance with one of the opposition. Nothing about this seems in any way odd.
Nothing odd either about travelling many miles and investing a great deal of time and money to play against another team whose skill sets are entirely unknown to you. It was when Chris, the host captain, casually let slip in the car they had ‘a couple of internationals’ turning out for them, I thought our trip might be doomed to embarrassing failure.
Nothing odd either about travelling many miles and investing a great deal of time and money to play against another team whose skill sets are entirely unknown to you. It was when Chris, the host captain, casually let slip in the car they had ‘a couple of internationals’ turning out for them, I thought our trip might be doomed to embarrassing failure.
In a way, it did end like that, but crucially, in another, it didn’t. Three matches played: won one, came second in the other two. It is possible to track our collective state through the three days thus:
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Unlike previous tours this one would be notable for all of the highs and lows taking place on the pitch. Opportunity for high-jinks post-cricket was in any case limited, as I suppose none of us really felt like cutting loose in a late-night bar populated by Portuguese teenagers. Any tensions remaining were resolved around the pool table.
Much like previous tours there was a certain amount of uncertainty around travel arrangements. Arriving early in the host town of Ansião, central Portugal, Sam was subject to questions by an increasingly bewildered Chris regarding the nature of his team-mates’ arrival: the whos, the hows and the whens. It soon became clear to both of them those questions had no satisfactory answers: Sam didn’t know who was arriving or how they intended to, let alone when. It was always like this, he said, watching the worry lines crease across Chris’s forehead.
Much like previous tours there was a certain amount of uncertainty around travel arrangements. Arriving early in the host town of Ansião, central Portugal, Sam was subject to questions by an increasingly bewildered Chris regarding the nature of his team-mates’ arrival: the whos, the hows and the whens. It soon became clear to both of them those questions had no satisfactory answers: Sam didn’t know who was arriving or how they intended to, let alone when. It was always like this, he said, watching the worry lines crease across Chris’s forehead.
Under lights
What eventually transpired, despite delays, was that everybody arrived on time for the first game on the Friday night, which rather thrillingly was to be our first match under lights. Everybody except Gates, that is, who had suffered a cancellation at Liverpool but nevertheless kept us all geed up with sardonic commentary from various drinking holes in the north-west of England.
We were the usual band of hardcore hopefuls, augmented this time by newcomer Matt - whose longevity at the bar the first night was sadly not to be replicated at the crease - and we looked upon this first challenge with that unique mixture of excitement and trepidation. Facing us was the unknown in the shape of the Amigos cricket club, made up of the young, the old, the hairy, the bald.
We batted first and things for a time looked very promising. Sam, who might have been given out before scoring - but wasn’t (and who anyway might have walked - but didn’t) - enjoyed the early luck and the middle of the bat in striking 45. Ollie too found some good form and the trees several times, batting through the rest of the innings and making the highest individual score for the OBOs over the weekend, being run out selflessly for 65. There were steady contributions from skipper Phil and Joe towards the end and the 20 overs were completed with the competitive score of 160 posted. |
Competitive. We quickly discovered the Amigos to be masters of kidology. ‘160 is usually about par,’ they said, ‘there is a secret to batting on this wicket,’ they said, ‘our internationals are only Portuguese internationals,’ they said. As the lights changed the OBOs found the adjustment difficult.160 wasn’t enough, the ‘secret’ was to hit everything square to the short boundaries, and an international is an international is an international. And our collective bowling effort was feeble. Only Ollie as usual escaped with any credit, being the solitary wicket taker as the Amigos found the rest of the bowling extremely friendly, romping to victory in 16 overs.
In between times there was ample refreshment on offer courtesy of the full-stocked bar and the excellent tea between innings. Obviously the novelty of such relative luxury was not ignored by any member of the visitors and much advantage was taken of the sustenance on offer. If the Amigos were exceptionally generous hosts the OBOs showed the appropriate good manners over the next three days.
The 40-over gameThe next day, as always, dawned for most of the team much too early. Even bolstered by the dramatic late-night arrival of Gates, there was a sense that a 40-over match with the day getting hotter against the canny home team might be beyond us. Charitably they had loaned us one of their players, Paolo - one of the internationals - in an attempt to balance things out and he would be responsible for at least two of the more memorable moments in a match that was more one-sided than the previous night’s.
Let us not dwell on the result; suffice to say in a match between two sides the OBOs were comfortably runners-up. The Amigos showed the full weight of their all-round potential with wickets shared and one of their batsmen, Drew, narrowly missing what would have been a deserved century. |
For the OBOs there were highlights. Joe started things off with an excellent tumbling catch behind off Ollie, and, soon after, took another one, easier this time, as the batsman skied one off the persevering Dave. After ten overs the OBOs had contained the opposition. But then Glen dropped a difficult chance off Drew at short extra cover and all the bowlers lost their lines and lengths. The next twenty overs felt like twenty years as the batsmen took advantage of the generous buffet donated. It took near-miraculous catches by Paolo - one diving full-length at cover off Gates, the other a mastery of steadiness on the boundary off Greg - to curtail the feast, but by then every offering had been plundered. Paolo was to take two catches as well off his own bowling and one hardly dares to imagine the outcome without his input. By the time Gates had brought Sam out of his boundary sulk and on to bowl the final over the Amigos had amassed 281 - a wicket maiden ended the innings on a faint positive note. Tactical, Gates had suggested, given Sam was to open the batting.
For a while it looked to be a master-stroke. The opening pair, Paolo at the other end, raced to 58 from only five overs. The aggressive start was enough to rouse a hungover Rich from his slumbers, his sledge ‘How’s that for a birthday present Rory!’ As a ball raced to the boundary from the opposition’s youngest player’s bowling symptomatic of the sudden (over)confidence in the visitors. Never mind the bowler’s name was Olly, and never mind he was shortly to have Sam caught at mid-wicket playing one shot too many. Phil came in to provide glue at the other end while the other batsmen danced their pretty tunes around him. Presumably that was the idea.
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Paolo perished not dying wondering, and Ollie, our Ollie, decided he’d have a look before getting stuck in. Unfortunately he could only look back as the first ball he faced rolled gently through his casual forward prod and onto the stumps. Matt and Glen both flickered briefly. But Phil was still there, holding up one end. In the sense of delaying scoring any runs whatsoever. His 2 from 27 balls was a masterpiece of how to leave the ball well alone and a consummate lesson in accidental defence. Meanwhile there was entertainment from Joe - who smashed a seat in the stands with a big six - and Robin, who said he was going to play a reverse sweep first ball, and did, executed perfectly straight to the fielder. The rest of the batting offered little resistance and the whole sorry mess was over by four o’clock.
Spirits were raised by the drinking of them. Appetites assuaged by the fabulous supper to go with the excellent tea provided by the unstinting and hugely appreciated team of ladies. The Amigos is very much a team affair. They look after each other and the opposition in equal measure. Every effort was made to make us feel welcome and they were humble in victory, even though as on the previous evening one of us had to wear the fox suit, a forfeit chosen by the umpire at the end of each game for a member of the losing side. For his golden duck it had to be Ollie, perhaps fitting as the animal theme featured heavily in his conversation throughout the tour, from the inability of chimps to use circuit boards and the weights of geckos.
Saturday evening ended in a dribble. This was the nadir, the slump, the aforementioned dejection. Could the OBOs rally themselves to end the tour on a high?
Saturday evening ended in a dribble. This was the nadir, the slump, the aforementioned dejection. Could the OBOs rally themselves to end the tour on a high?
Sunday celebration
Sunday. This was to be a day of merriment and memories to savour. More of a social day, with each team having two 20-over innings, Test-style, and fielding as many as 12 players. A couple of the players’ wives turned out for the Amigos, proving as protective over their wickets as for the cake at tea. They also posed conundrums for several of our team.
OBOs to bat with a batting order chosen at random. Gates and Glen set the tone, each of them hitting boundaries. Sam in next, his decent form continuing as boundaries flowed, even clearing the stadium at one point with one well-timed pull shot. Batsmen could retire at 30 with the possibility to come back in and he narrowly missed the milestone, caught at mid-off. The wicket came as a relief for a characterful member of the opposition, Stubbsie, who up to that point had seen three consecutive drops off his bowling. His piratical howl of delight as the catch was finally held was accompanied by a sweaty embrace for the departing batsman. Not exactly Ravi Bopara. With Ollie slated to come in at 12, it was up to others to step forward. Matt held his hand up, striking two sixes before being run out by Joe - who promptly made up for his error by completing an unbeaten 35 in partnership with Rich, whose Kohli-esque bat twirls were another show of contempt for the opposition’s efforts. He too would have to retire and the two of them gave the innings some middle-order oomph. One can’t forget Robin, who was apparently so mesmerised by - or respectful to - the first ball by one of the ladies, Leigh, that he missed it and was bowled. Nick showed great composure in his first bat of the tour by batting with the tail and making an undefeated 17. Finished 167, what would be the OBOs highest score of the tour.
OBOs to bat with a batting order chosen at random. Gates and Glen set the tone, each of them hitting boundaries. Sam in next, his decent form continuing as boundaries flowed, even clearing the stadium at one point with one well-timed pull shot. Batsmen could retire at 30 with the possibility to come back in and he narrowly missed the milestone, caught at mid-off. The wicket came as a relief for a characterful member of the opposition, Stubbsie, who up to that point had seen three consecutive drops off his bowling. His piratical howl of delight as the catch was finally held was accompanied by a sweaty embrace for the departing batsman. Not exactly Ravi Bopara. With Ollie slated to come in at 12, it was up to others to step forward. Matt held his hand up, striking two sixes before being run out by Joe - who promptly made up for his error by completing an unbeaten 35 in partnership with Rich, whose Kohli-esque bat twirls were another show of contempt for the opposition’s efforts. He too would have to retire and the two of them gave the innings some middle-order oomph. One can’t forget Robin, who was apparently so mesmerised by - or respectful to - the first ball by one of the ladies, Leigh, that he missed it and was bowled. Nick showed great composure in his first bat of the tour by batting with the tail and making an undefeated 17. Finished 167, what would be the OBOs highest score of the tour.
In the spirit of the game the Amigos also rejigged their batting order and the OBOs started tightly with Janika’s first over of the tour a maiden. Early success was shortly to follow as Robin pouched an instinctive grab off his own bowling. While one opener got stuck in wickets fell at the other end, Sam and Gates with some joy there, and the middle overs saw the Amigos becalmed.
The arrival of two of the ladies at the crease was to cause moments of confusion. Phil caught a catch behind off Leigh’s first ball - but then wondered if he should have - and evidently perplexity filtered through to the opposition as Chris found himself in the unfortunate circumstance of running out his own wife. Unfortunate for him no doubt.
The arrival of two of the ladies at the crease was to cause moments of confusion. Phil caught a catch behind off Leigh’s first ball - but then wondered if he should have - and evidently perplexity filtered through to the opposition as Chris found himself in the unfortunate circumstance of running out his own wife. Unfortunate for him no doubt.
Not so Gates, who not only did not attempt to vary his pace in any way when bowling to a lady who had barely held a bat before but also was seen sprinting to cut off what would be her first ever boundary. A whole-hearted member of the team, Gates, not holding back on the field - or, it transpired, off it either, as his end-of-play speech thanking the hosts managed to include references to a certain referendum result for which the expat audience were no doubt extremely grateful.
Anyway with some late-order hitting the Amigos had managed to get themselves up to 130, and the OBOs, spirits raised once more, went out to bat again. There were 30-plus contributions from Ollie, Nick and Dave meaning the Amigos had to chase a score in excess of 170.
Dave was quickly among the wickets, bagging the opening pair. All the bowlers stuck to their tasks well but really the highlight was the collective fielding effort. Players were seen literally throwing their bodies in the way to prevent runs - Nick and Greg most notably - and to make it clear how much this performance meant Greg on taking a wicket was greeted by a bear-hug from Gates. Phil took yet another catch behind the wicket, surely a record for such dismissals on tour, and once danger-man Drew was out and skipper Chris retired, the OBOs scented victory. A feat soon achieved with Nick - captain for the game - rightfully bowling out the last over.
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Never had post-match drinks tasted so sweet. Never had the clink of ice on glass sounded such notes of joy. Success at last. A great team effort and a great team to play against too. We will remember the Woodlands cricket ground, aptly named for the forest surroundings (which we had plenty of time to explore, hunting for lost balls), the view from the stands, the kindness and generosity of our hosts, the teas and the suppers, the ups and downs, the gin and the tonic. Whatever next year brings it will have a hard act to follow. Saúde!
Report by Sam Tarr